BEAUTIFUL IN JESUS

Self-esteem is certainly one thing to always talk about, most especially now that social media puts a threat on it these days.

What goes through your mind when think of someone with a low self-esteem?

It's amazing how many of the low self esteem problems starts at a tender age. It can be tormenting and torturous as you grow older with it. Many feel they're never good enough because of low self esteem, hence, they seek validation everywhere possible. Low self-esteem comes with timidity and insecurity but these are two different words many people love to use together when it comes to low self esteem but are different. Timidity refers to shyness; a fear of social interactions while Insecurity refers to self doubt or the lack of confidence in one self. Timidity is what comes as a result of insecurity which best describes low self esteem. People dealing with insecurities feel an intense pressure to bend to the expectations of others and most importantly avoid criticism especially from the public. 

As humans, we have God's view of us, the opinion of others concerning us and what we think of ourselves too. God's view is the ultimate, the opinions of others may sometimes be exaggerated or underrated and most times, one of these 2 shapens our self-perception. Some of the causes of low self esteem involves physical features, physical or emotional abuse, tragic circumstances etc. In this phase, we tend to gravitate towards things that we think can give us the validation we want and also find solace in them which unfortunately never works.

Low self-esteem generates anxiety, stress, loneliness, and an increased likelihood of depression, it cause problems with friendships and romantic relationships and seriously impairs academic and job performance and in so many cases, lead to increased vulnerability to drug and alcohol abuse and self-harm.

As much as insecurity is the distortion of self love, while finding it, beware of arrogance because it is overly self-obsessing and self-focused. Be humble while finding self love, humility and insecurity aren't together as well. I've learnt that humility doesn't need you to undervalue yourself, learn to rate yourself beautifully.

The best way you can do away with self esteem is loving God and immersing yourself in him, drown yourself in him so much that you begin to glow and see others through the lens of Christ. 

As a low self-esteem survivor, God was the one who helped me through this. While i spent so much time in his presence, he taught me to seek my validation from him and no one else because in him lies all the validation we seek and his validation brings fulfilment. I grew up to be called a "black dog" because of my skin complexion and that wrecked the most part of my life until i found Christ. Funny enough, the person who was used to calling me this didn't remember calling me that when i wanted to talk about it and heal but as a little child that time, that name sank deep into my memory and wrecked a larger part of me for years, I never felt good for once. At a point, I started to seek validation from people, I surrendered myself without reservation to anyone who was there to provide a warm hug and an understanding heart and was ready to do anything to keep it but did it satisfy me? NO! 

My lack of self-esteem became a cause of sexual immorality for me. I gained my self esteem through spiritual regeneration in Christ and I've never regretted it. 

Never forget you have confidence and boldness in Christ Jesus.

..... in whom we have boldness and confident access through faith in Him.

Ephesians 3:12 NASB

If your self-esteem majorly has to do with your physical features, please note that as a human, you're first spirit and spirits are genderless. The body you have now will be no more someday, so do not overwork yourself on things that are carnal. You are beautiful in Christ and he doesn't think otherwise of you. God defines your worth and you're secured in his love, just like Paul in 1 Corinthians 15:10, by God's grace, you are what you are. Your soul is worth more than anything in this world to him, you are what he calls you, you are his treasure and you are priceless.